Grin Confuses Crown Cat Red Eyes
1. Locate your face. It is the thing that frowns when no one asks it to.
2. Widen the mouth. Not a smile. A grin. Teeth visible. Eyes empty.
3. Hold this shape when they expect sadness. Hold it harder when they expect anger.
4. Do not explain. The crown on your head is not for them to understand.
5. Watch them leave confused. This is the point.
WARNING: Prolonged use may result in the grin becoming permanent. The cat in the image is not an example. The cat is a warning that arrived too late.
ā Extracted from a pamphlet titled "How to Disappear While Still Visible," author unknown, distribution illegal in 14 countries.